Real but Unlikely-Sounding Rap Names, Installment 96

Frank Castle Cooking Gang

Real but Unlikely-Sounding Rap Names, Installment 78

Funk Wizard Snow

Real but Unlikely-Sounding Rap Names, Installment 77

PSYKOPAT

Lance Butters? Scheiße

Real but Unlikely Sounding Rap Names, Installment 71

King Orgasmus

wtf

Lampin' in the Hamptons like
What the fuck is a hammock?
The chef up in the kitchen like
What the fuck is a sammich?
I'm like we need to find middle ground.
We need balance.

-- Lil Wayne, "Stilettos"

I review Chandler Klang Smith’s Goldenland Past Dark in the Manner of South Jersey Magazine’s restaurant reviews

Though Wolfgang Puck may be the Godfather of modern fusion cuisine, Chandler Klang Smith has written a novel about circus performers. Smith’s debut, Goldenland Past Dark, is sizable but approachable. While the book consists of many chapters, our astute waitress was on top of her game and quick to assist in helping us pick Chapter One as the place to begin.

I admit that Smith’s novel had been on my radar for some time before my reading partner and I ventured into its new location in a tucked-away alcove in the Cherry Hill Mall. Novels are a risky venture in today’s economy. Some fall victim to too many ideas and not enough refinement. Others come out unfortunately undercooked. Yet Goldenland satisfies with its creamy, smoky filling and crispy outside. Smith’s novel is perhaps best described as a buttery mix of creamy themes set in a rich, deep gravy of narrative momentum. Her characters have a crackling outer crust that supplies a nice bite of black pepper on every page.

My reading partner chose the book’s climax. She was not disappointed. I found myself peeking over her shoulder to steal forkfuls of plot points, which were drizzled in a light carrot-empathy sauce both so familiar and so richly exotic.